Welcome to 2012, where validation is sought-after through Instagram likes, nothing is ever personal, weed is recreational and strip clubs are the new hang out spots. Yes, if you ain’t at the strip club you just ain’t hot.
From Maliah Michel to Draya Michele to Blac Chyna to Amber Rose, strippers haven’t only become the hot commodity for rappers but they also have taken over music. You can’t listen to one song without mention of a stripper dropping it, popping it, slaying it, tossing it up and down, throwing it (…you get the point). It seems as if you don’t mention a strip club or a stripper your song just isn’t hot. Now, I don’t mind hearing about strippers in every single rap song I listen too. (I’m lying) If she wants to dance for Bands, go ahead, but I do have a problem when it pours into my everyday life.
For an associates birthday she wanted us all go to a strip club and I agreed, it was her birthday and she had always been kind to me, so I thought ok. I didn’t know what to expect, I had never been to one and never really had a desire too. Don’t get me wrong, I love women and I think it takes a certain confidence to get in front of hundreds of people and flaunt what your mother gave you, clap and applaud to that courage, but I just didn’t want to see and pay to see it at that. I went and before made sure I had a drink to loosen my mood, walking in we were double and triple checked by security after waiting on a long line, we proceeded in. With music blasting in the background, I scanned the crowded expecting to see your typical rapper-esque men but no oh no oh no…it was 80% women! All types of women, a few were even dressed as if they were the strippers.
The night continued on, my drink had worn off and I was over it. After hearing Meek Mill’s “House Party” 202043874737 times, I knew my time was up, I tapped one of the girls I was with and said “Hey, I’m leaving, have a great night. Talk to you later.” And instead of receiving a “Bye, girl get home safe.” I got a “Why, are you being like that and leaving?” followed by a “catty” stare. Granted, I didn’t participate like the rest of the crew I was with (by participate I mean, throwing some money on a girl, slapping a couple of butts and getting my very own personal lap dance, complimentary head stand in my lap of course.) there was no reason to judge. Instead of a side eye response, I left.
I can’t count how many times, I’ve been asked to go to a strip club after that. Literally, it has become the hang out spot for most of the people I know and a large group of them are women. (Well, recently a guy I was dating asked “for my birthday can we go to a strip club? Throwing money of a few girls together.” and when I responded with a “huh?” he dropped the subject.) Usually, before I’masked I get a “I know you’re not into women touching you…” or “I know how you feel about strippers…” or a “Nah, you act to stuck up for strip clubs…” WRONG! It has nothing to do with the club itself, but why should I be forced to go, even if it’s what’s popular, if I don’t like it. Yes! I am not afraid to stand up and say… I don’t like going to strip clubs! *sigh of relief*
When I was younger, a strip club or strippers were something reserved. Going was your personal business and kept personal. Men that did go were stereotyped as horny and extremely creepy, who couldn’t get a woman so he would frequent strip clubs to get a peek of what he didn’t have. And in some other cases, strippers would attend a guy’s bachelor party as his last hurrah and glimpse of the single world. But now, you even have children with aspirations of becoming a stripper and going to clubs. With all the glitz and glamor glorified in music and videos, it’s hard not to think the life is dazzling and imagining weekends at the strip club, but I just don’t get it.
Truth be told, a lot of the females that do frequent these clubs, do it because it’s what’s in, seems appealing to men, and want to meet men. Really think, what man would take any woman serious who he sees every week at the strip club? What woman would want a man who spends every week at the strip club? Why would you spend money you barely have, every week at the strip club? Personally, it saddens me that women have been belittled so much to the point that we join in on the belittling. (but that’s another topic…)
So excuse me if I don’t want a Big Booty Whore for my birthday, and I don’t jump for joy when it’s ladies night at the strip club…it just isn’t my thing. And Bandz won’t make this brown girl dance, but paying back my student loans and investing in my career would.